How many Ph.D.s does it take to change a light bulb?

We’re rapidly emerging from the Dark Season. We’re already up almost a full hour from the low, with 4 hours and 40 minutes today and increasing daily by over 5 minutes. But that’s looking on the bright side. On the dark side, you need indoor lighting more than ever at this time of year. And so I was getting annoyed with the fluorescent fixture that wasn’t pulling its weight.

About a month ago I’d replaced both bulbs, and it lit things up like a champ. But then just weeks later it just as suddenly went back to dimly and shakily letting us know the light switch was on. Sort of like an NYPD work slowdown, working at about 10% capacity, if that.

I figured it must be the ballast, and so finally took the time to begin dismantling it to take a good look at probably replacing it. Off came the cover, then as I worked to take out the first bulb, a loose connection was tightened and boom — full light again. Easiest fix to a fixture I’ve ever made. What the heck? I’m blaming it on an earthquake shaking the bulb loose. (“Yeah, right…,” you’re thinking.)

So, how many Ph.D.s does it take to change a light bulb?

For awhile here, the answer was clearly > 1. With time, the bulb monkey would like to think he’s brought it firmly down to 1.0. Realistically, though, given that the subpar light taunted and provoked the bulb monkey for over a week, we’re clearly looking at some value > 1.0; at best it might be 1.x, where x > 0. Maybe I can distract you from the answer — Ooo, ooo, ooo! Look how bright that light is!